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Smack-Talk
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Will JT's recent illness affect his performance against Dean on Sunday?
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely not, although if one were to fall for the extreme bias against the four-time champion on this website, he/she certainly might think so.
DeleteIt matters not. JT will let his performance speak for itself!!
I hope JT shows up....Im sure he will have some excuse not to have to face defeat once again...OH what a long year it will be for him again...cant wait for Sunday!!! or for the next excuse...GO OBAMA !!!!!
DeleteThe above post and this one is from DR....dont know how to sign with my initials.....anyone surprised?
DeleteI just hope JT comes prepared..........chicken leg ankles wrapped up, pregame adjustment of gross weight completed (to prevent another emergency trip to quicktrip), and making sure his girlfriend gives him permission to play now that he's gone soft
ReplyDeleteMy prediction is DR over JT in 3 sets
Rumor has it that TR and MG MIGHT play at the same time on Sunday at Harmon. If so, the mighty Simba will run away with his tail between his legs after TR mops the court with him.
TR over MG in 3 sets (if played on Sunday)
Hey JT, the picture of you over the toilet is not quite accurate..........your SKIRT is missing!!!!!!!
DeleteI promise to wear shorts tomorrow in lieu of a skirt, Dean. No doubt it would be very embarassing for you to be crushed in front of your family by a man wearing a skirt. :)
DeleteJT, make sure to wrap your little ankles and bring plenty of water....you are in for a massive punishment today on the court.......oh yes, dont forget to go potty, we dont want to have to delay your BEATDOWN.....cant wait till 2:15 !!!!!
DeleteTR and I are playing at 2:15 and I'm going to crush the cake eater. TB you are just lucky that I'm not in the top have of the bracket with so called "Champions."
ReplyDeleteFeel The Roar,
Mufasa
Mr. Gish, You'll have the chance to face the "So called Champions" in the playoffs. That is... unless the roar comes from a "Paper-Tiger".
DeleteSmell the Catnip,
Defending Champion - SV
Scuttlebutt is that MN was seen lifting heavy furniture recently. Therefore, there is no reason his injured hand should prevent his match with AS! Deadline is approaching guys... let's get the match done.
ReplyDeleteWill it be a capacity crowd on Sunday? Shall we rent bleachers?
ReplyDeleteKind of looking forward to it. And to seeing if there will indeed, be any skirts worn.
KB (how did you do that initial thing, DR?)
News that everyone should know. IF and I mean a big IF the little pussy cat MG wins today I feel entitled to half of his fantasy points because he called me begging to borrow my racket. He openly admitted that he wanted to know what true power felt like when swinging a real racket, apparently he must have purchased his from range rover since it's been as big of a lemon as his old vehicle!!!!
ReplyDeleteSecond, I asked JT yesterday if he was nervous about his upcoming match. He calmly replied that no he wasn't nervous but that he was worried about one issue. It has come to light that JT doesn't perform well in front of large crowds! He openly admitted how uncomfortable it makes him feel. I think that if you can't make it to observe todays match be sure to send someone in your place. A family member, friend, or local barber, just anyone to make it more difficult for JT! I heard that DR's daughter is showing up with all of her college girlfriends and we all know how JT gets nervous around women!!
I think in honor of TR's victory... he should be nick-named "Lion Tamer"!
ReplyDeleteJT will experience his first loss of the young tennis season this upcoming Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteWell, I was hoping I wouldn't have to be the one to deliver TB's first loss, but it's time to deflate that swelling head of confidence. Clearly, it will not be easy, and I have no delusions of grandure, but the only thing to stop me from defeating him would be getting whacked by the Chicago mob, which i will always be looking over my shoulder for...The ball's in your court TB, and I don't think your reverse brown eye man-oover is going to help
ReplyDeleteNate quit dreaming homie. You've got as good of a chance at beating me as gish did with ted (and we all know how that turned out)! You mess with the bull you get the horns, prepare to be sleeping with the fishes off of navy pier. I'm looking forward now to mopping the court with either AJ or CG's tears in the semi's.
ReplyDelete-TB-
If anyone has tips for nate on how to stay healthy over the next couple of weeks that would be great. I think he's actually just scared and using a fake illness to hide the fact he doesn't want to face me! SV we are all still waiting for a picture of nate throwing up into the toilet!!! Be sure to include other pictures teasing other players, I think JT's panties are in a bunch for being the only one with an insulting picture haha!
ReplyDeleteI thought that was a rather flattering photo... considering:)
DeleteAlright Tango-Bad attempt at a self-given nickname, really, just awful.
ReplyDeleteYou are like a Japanese Zero in the gunsights of this Warhawk. Finger on the trigger, gun camera recording, all 12 cylinders thundering like the hammers of hell, you are going down in a heap of twisted steel my friend.
As for my "illness", That was just me being a nice guy, and delaying your loss to give you a few more days of feeling good about yourself. Your days are numbered. Start thinking of what you would like it to say on your tombstone!
End Transmission
Hey P-40, not to worry. That Tango-Badness thing? It's just a comment on his dancing abilities. Grace ain't his middle name...
ReplyDeleteThanks to my sandbagging abilities in tennis, I will soon be taking over in Fantasy. I learned these abilities from our late great Governor Blagojevich. I put 20 points on myself while BW only put 8. Once I cruise through CA and CD, I will gain 24 points on BW. Seeing as I'm only down 12, you will soon be seeing MUFASA back on top.
ReplyDeleteOh MG, your so simple minded and self absorbed you fail to look at the rest of the bracket, and only think of your own matches. Heres the REAL deal, once the joke of a fantasy commish fixes his errors, I immediately gain 12 points on you, then another 12 when KN dispatches DS. Tack on 4 when I defeat Morty, 5 when MM takes out AS, and another 6 when KB de-commisions Nextel, all of a sudden your self proclaimed Lion looks much like a lamb. Sure, you'll gain a few points here and there, but in the end I may just end up hanging you on my wall. I've yet to add a lion mount(or lamb) to my wall of trophys.
ReplyDeleteOh Mr. Gish....aka Man-gina. I don't know where to begin. You claim to be making a run for the fantasy title but there are a few issues with that. I don't blame you though, everyone else is worried about actually winning the tournament for best player where you just want to win something for being the best "picker of names on a piece of paper". Clearly the actions of a dirtbag white sux fan. You freely admitted to so many about possibly throwing the match vs axtell for an "easier" run into the playoffs. That would've have made you play Keith then BY. That there is the problem, I read the comment from "concerned citizen" on the main page about you and Keith possibly having a supervisor/developmental deal going on behind closed doors. If you would've had to play Keith that would've ruined any chance you had of winning the fantasy hardware. So now you play CD then maybe JT. I think you have the ability to knock Curt out of the tournament due to his hatred of heat, missing his purse dog for the short time he's gone, lack of being able to text Kelly "I love you" 78 times in a 60 minute period, or simple lack of showing up for something when he said he would. So if you manage a win against CD then the dynasty-douche will finally have an easy match against you.
ReplyDeleteI think you need to sit down and have a heart to heart with yourself and realize that you stand no chance of winning anything (much like the lions in the upcoming NFL season, KABOOM).
Dear Mr. O'Connor,
ReplyDeleteYou have now pushed off our match 3 weeks in a row due to:
Week 1 - sickness (ran out of feminine hygiene products)
Week 2 - Got scared and had no excuse so you ran home to Twin Turds...sorry I mean twin cities
Week 3 - Took a line out of JT's book and conveniently "rolled" your ankle
Week 4 - TBD....anyone have any guess for this week?
I hope the new racket you bought was flown in from Spain from Nadal himself because it's the only way you stand a chance at defeating the next Champion. I might start taking bets at not whether or not you smash your 3rd racket but how long it takes, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say 2 games into the 1st set.
Sincerely,
Matt your neighbor, trainee, and WORST NIGHTMARE
It has been brought to my attention that nobody has been going after JT lately on the smack talk board. It's time to change that without the trash talk but simply by giving information. For those of you don't know JT tried to change the rules on scoring this past Tuesday when he and I practiced before the SV/DNR match. After I mopped the court with his tears (he lost 2-6 in the first set) he went on the record to challenge the games I won. Apparently if you hit shots that vary in distance (cut shots that just clear the net then follow it with a shot toward the back line) it is considered illegal in JT's book (which being that he's from Ohio probably isn't a big book at all and consists mostly of pictures for coloring).
ReplyDeleteFor those of you that play JT in the upcoming weeks I'll give you some advice. As already stated be sure to play the short shots and long shots alternating as much as possible. Tell him how awesome and politically correct the Daily Show with John Stewart and anything on MSNBC is. Show up to a work shift prior to the match wearing sandals. Inform him how every auto maker out there is better than Ford. All of this information can probably be forgotten due to that fact that he leans so far to the right he won't make any left turns enroute to the court and won't show up on time leaving him to forfeit. I hope this information has been helpful to all who read it.
Yours truly,
Croatian Sensation
Where to begin. First of all Matthew, from now on you are known as nothing more than Semenski...(if you don't know what this is check urban dictionary) Second, don't be mad I text Kelli, be mad I am the one getting some... Touche on bringing my purse dog into this. Next I have been doing some running in the heat to overcome the exhaustion that has brought me down in recent history. Now Semenski, I hope you dont have many points riding on your sandbagging cuddle buddy Gish. (yes we all know what you two do in your free time) His first year of Tower Tennis will come to an end very soon. As in the lion kind he will be shunned and the pain of his upcoming loss will prove so devastating that he will never ever show his face again in tower tennis. So I will end with this.. Soon enough you sir and Mr. Gish will both be side lined wearing your pom poms and skirts cheering on the real men in this tournament.
ReplyDeleteWith much respect,
Dr. Enis
Dear Tango-Douchebag,
ReplyDeleteHere's a little review on my McEnroe-like history and love for the game of tennis.
Cheap tennis racket, and tennis balls for first year in tournament:...$45.
Better tennis racket, tennis balls for second season:...$85.
Replace broken racket, more tennis balls, and re-string for season 3:...$110.
Replace broken racket again, re-string again, and more tennis balls again for this season:...$215
Seeing you fold like a cheap tent in your own pool of blood, sweat, and tears, after I defeat you tuesday:.........Priceless
There are some things money can't buy, for everything else, YOU CAN SUCK IT!
Dear Womanly Warhawk,
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to see you finally grow a pair and attempt to talk shit online. Only problem is that like your tennis game, your insults are old, outdated, and plain ol' shitty. Next time you're gonna steal tv commercial material I suggest the All State mayhem quotes, at least those are funny! You're trash talking abilities rival that of BW at the skyzone dodgeball, one shot then knocked out by the competition until the next round!
I want everyone to know that Nate drove back to shitty-apolis again today and I'm thinking that he got scared....again.....for the 4th week in a row. I'm hoping he comes back in time to receive his beating on the court like Schewe will receive at the hands of Deanna, like the beating that tyson gave to that guy in the hangover movie, a beating like chase gives himself behind closed doors.
Sincerely,
Raging Ridonkulous Raptor
Dear Balkan Bitch,
ReplyDeleteDynasty Douche?? Really?? I realize that you excel at flapping that gaping hole in your face, but I expect better than that!!
As I recall, during that practice match, you were down a hard 3-1 in the second set before we had to conclude to allow SV and DNR to play their match. I've got your panty-waste net game figured out. I've found your kryptonite, so to speak.
So keep screaming in the breeze, punk... it's all you're going to have soon!
Congratulations is in order for Mr. Broadway in his most recent win and knocking out the first player of this years tournament. Next for Kevin though is stiff competition in Mr. O'Connor. Who will leave this match victorious?
ReplyDeleteLet's look at the facts, Nate is clearly still upset from his most recent loss to TB at tennis and is preoccupied with his next new purchase, a purse dog. Between that and keeping the tiny toyota truck clean he clearly has no time to focus on the upcoming match. I think he should leave excalibur in the stone and work on pulling his hello kitty racket out of the pebble (he's to weak for the stone). Will Nate be able to contain his hulk-like anger? He will no doubt have his 3 stooges show up in their cheerleading outfits again (Ted, Chief Nextell, and Jabronious-Maximus.....JT). Their continous support could help him keep a positive attitude needed to manage a victory.
BW has a few issues to deal with also. He apparent obsession with the most boring sport of all time (NASCAR) could leave him in a trance after watching the 200 super exciting continuous left turns during the weekend races. He and Schewe discuss racing like curt and kelly text each "I love you"......alllllll the time. Maybe he will be too busy planting turnips for this years hunting season or working on how best to rig fantasy football in his favor? If he loses a few games in a set will he be able to let it go and regroup for a win (unlike skyzone dodgeball when he was one and done every game ALL NIGHT). In the event BW loses he will at least be able to go home and be consoled by his 7 on 7 football championship ring from highschool.
I look forward to an excellent match and will gladly report if defending champ SV is unable to attend.
Regards,
Tango Badass
It is been predicted that CD will triumph over Man-gina in 2 sets then dominate JT in 3 sets. As a curious spectator I'm wondering if this will prove to be true? Thoughts?
ReplyDeleteOnly thing Curt is going to dominate is the stretcher that'll be used to carry him off the court after/if he plays me in a match!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm officially announcing a $20.00 bounty on Matt's head!!! A twenty dollar bounty will be paid to the first person to defeat Matt in a sanctioned match, henceforth shutting the giant, noisy hole in his face... even if it is only temporary!
JT, I like your bounty on TB! I'll add $50 for anyone who beats him!
DeleteI understand the odds are against me in my upcoming match against TeeBee. His credentials speak for themselves.
ReplyDelete2011 runner up TT Champ.
2012 Undeafeated in reg season play to this point.
2012 Responsible for Norwalk Peanut Butter famine.
Only CD appreciates the third one. Last time I played a game against Matt I hit him in the face with a 50mph dodgeball, only difference this time is I will be aiming for Moose's chew toy.
- Croation Groin
Previous post unnecessarily censored by the supposed "FAIR & BALANCEd" eSVn. I guess some people can get away with saying whatever they damn well please, well others cannot.
ReplyDeleteBW, I was out at a restaurant when I read your deleted post. In my haste, I didn't get your profile id. I went back and read TB's post about you - Wow, he really put it to you! I can see why you slammed him do hard! However, I didn't think the young lady in question deserved a post like that. I will disable post moderation when I get home later tonight.
DeleteThe instructions at the top of this page request that you do not post anonymously! Playful banter can add to the tournament experience, but mean spirited remarks posted from the anonymity of cyberspace only serve to insult and are less than honorable. By identifying yourself as the author of your comments... It is hoped that this will serve as a method of self-policing. I do not wish to engage in censorship, but feel it would be irresponsible to permit insulting remarks posted anonymously, or to permit post of an EXTREME nature.
ReplyDeleteNo finer example of smack can be found on this site than that posted by WARHAWK! For those of you who enjoy the art of banter... I challenge you to post comments as well written as his!
If you're not sure how to identify yourself as the author. Please let me know, and I'll help.
I think Nate should receive a trophy for his "smack talk" abilities because it's the only hardware he will get!!! We all know the warhawk is going to run out of gas and have to make a gear up landing in Norwalk enroute to his early exit in the playoffs!!
ReplyDeleteI wanted to have a practice match with TB on Friday before I play JT. However, TB said he was going to see Magic Mike and couldn't play. I requested to play Saturday but TB said he was going to a Magic Mike marathon. Same thing on Sunday. Either he is scared to play me or just loves watching men strip. I'm guessing it's both. Luckily to play JT I already have all the skills I need to break his glass ankles. Drop shotting him to pieces.
ReplyDeleteMG, you'd be easy prey for me even if BOTH my ankles were broken!
ReplyDeleteThere once was a wannabe named Matt,
ReplyDeletewho played tennis like a PUSSYcat.
His vagina grew sore,
He couldn't take anymore,
And he fell to the Dynasty Champ!
I have a prediction for this years tournament...
ReplyDeleteJT Shattered ankles
TB Shattered lady parts
The finals will be DR and SV, and it will be anyones game!